'The Cake is a Lie' Portal Cupcakes

Finally, a cake that Portal fans can rejoice about: one that exists! When making this cupcake, I thought about doing silly things like making the cupcake actually a meatloaf or something like that, but you guys have been through enough cake torment. This is a no fuss, as real as it gets, cupcake.

Chocolate Cupcake Ingredients: (yields 12 cupcakes)

  • 1.5 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 3/4 cup sweetened cocoa
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 cup milk
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
  • 1/2 cup hot brewed coffee (I used a hazelnut blend for added flavor)
  • Honey
  • Chocolate sprinkles

Chocolate Cupcake Directions:

  • Preheat oven to 350º F.
  • Place cupcake liners in muffin tin.
  • Whisk together flour, sugar, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in a large bowl.
  • Add milk, vegetable oil, egg, and vanilla to flour mixture and mix together  until well combined.  Add hot brewed coffee to the cake batter. Beat on high speed for about 1 minute. Batter will be runny.
  • Evenly distribute cake batter into cupcake liners.
  • Place in preheated oven and bake 16-18 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
  • Remove from the oven and allow the cupcakes to cool. It is important that the cupcakes are COMPLETELY cooled before proceeding.
  • Lightly brush a layer of honey over each cupcake top, and dip honey-coated tops into the sprinkles.

Whipped Cream Frosting Ingredients & Directions:

  • In a medium sized bowl, pour in 8 oz of whipping cream and whip until fluffy and stiff. Beat in 1/2 to 3/4 (depending on your preference) cups granulated sugar and 1/2 TSP vanilla extract.
  • Pipe on to cupcakes, and top each cupcake with a maraschino cherry.

I apologize for being late on this week’s cupcakes!

I was momentarily broke and couldn’t afford cupcake ingredients, BUT never fear, I’m back on track and this week I will release two different batches of cupcakes! Way cool!

Vote for this week’s cupcakes!

Send a message (or reply to this post) with one of the following options:

  • Honningbrew Mead Cupcakes (inspired by Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim)
  • Pokéblock Cakes (inspired by Pokémon)
  • Pep Bar Cupcakes (inspired by Bioshock)
  • Cake Cupcakes (inspired by Portal)

Or, send a message with a different suggestion!

I would like to thank the academy.

I would like to thank the academy.

Monster Meat Cupcakes - Inspired by ‘Don’t Starve’
Blueberry Bacon Cake + Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting
Blueberry Bacon Cake Ingredients
(yields 1 dozen)
6-7 strips of bacon (cooked & minced)
Reserved bacon drippings from cooked bacon, refrigerated & solidified.
3 TBSP butter, room temperature.
2 eggs
5 TBSP brown sugar
5 TBSP blueberry syrup
1 1/4 C self-rising flour
1  TSP baking powder
1/4 TSP salt
1/4 C milk
Blueberry Bacon Cake Directions:
Cream together solidified bacon drippings and butter until fluffy.
Beat in eggs until just combined.
Add in brown sugar and syrup until smooth.
Sift together flour, baking soda, and salt.
Add 1/2 of the dry ingredients to the batter, pour in milk, and beat in the rest of the dry ingredients.
Fold in minced bacon.
Line cupcake pan and pour in batter until cups are 3/4 full. Bake in a 350 degree oven for 16-18 minutes.
Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting Ingredients:
4 oz cream cheese (room temperature)
4 oz butter (room temperature)
3-4 C powdered sugar
1-2 TBSP blueberry syrup
Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting Directions:
Cream together cream cheese and butter until fluffy.
Gradually add in powdered sugar.
Mix in blueberry syrup until evenly distributed.
OPTIONAL: add in purple food coloring to the cupcake batter and black food coloring to the frosting for a more authentic ‘Monster Meat’ appearance.

Monster Meat Cupcakes - Inspired by ‘Don’t Starve

Blueberry Bacon Cake + Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting

Blueberry Bacon Cake Ingredients

(yields 1 dozen)

  • 6-7 strips of bacon (cooked & minced)
  • Reserved bacon drippings from cooked bacon, refrigerated & solidified.
  • 3 TBSP butter, room temperature.
  • 2 eggs
  • 5 TBSP brown sugar
  • 5 TBSP blueberry syrup
  • 1 1/4 C self-rising flour
  • 1  TSP baking powder
  • 1/4 TSP salt
  • 1/4 C milk

Blueberry Bacon Cake Directions:

  • Cream together solidified bacon drippings and butter until fluffy.
  • Beat in eggs until just combined.
  • Add in brown sugar and syrup until smooth.
  • Sift together flour, baking soda, and salt.
  • Add 1/2 of the dry ingredients to the batter, pour in milk, and beat in the rest of the dry ingredients.
  • Fold in minced bacon.
  • Line cupcake pan and pour in batter until cups are 3/4 full. Bake in a 350 degree oven for 16-18 minutes.

Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting Ingredients:

  • 4 oz cream cheese (room temperature)
  • 4 oz butter (room temperature)
  • 3-4 C powdered sugar
  • 1-2 TBSP blueberry syrup

Blueberry Cream Cheese Frosting Directions:

  • Cream together cream cheese and butter until fluffy.
  • Gradually add in powdered sugar.
  • Mix in blueberry syrup until evenly distributed.

OPTIONAL: add in purple food coloring to the cupcake batter and black food coloring to the frosting for a more authentic ‘Monster Meat’ appearance.

Who’s ready for some bacon blueberry ‘Monster Meat’ cupcakes?

(hint: I am)

Next Week’s Cupcakes : ‘Monster Meat’ Cupcakes inspired by Don’t Starve

You, my dear friend, mixed two of my top favorite things in the world. You're awesome!!! If you ever get inspired, i would wish to see a combo of the triforce (Nayru, Din and Farore) :D

@yuleen75

You, my dear friend, are awesome. My boyfriend (and executive taste taster) completely concurs with your idea. I’ll keep it in mind!

This is the coolest blog ever

@losversos-mastristes

Thank you!!! xx